Sunday, March 23, 2014

F You, Universe

My milk is coming in.

I am told to bind with two sports bras, use frozen peas or ice in my bra, and take Motrin. Apparently the drug they used to give women to turn off the milk made for no one ended up giving some of those women strokes.

I don't know if I can ever trust anyone or anything again -- can ever accept that there is real beauty, or pleasure, without pain -- knowing that such a betrayal can be allowed to exist in this world.

11 comments:

Turia said...

Here. Reading. Thinking of you, every day.
xoxo

Brianna said...

Yes, another reminder. I did the sports bra and iced for 20 minutes 3-4 times a day. Also, when taking a shower, limit the amount of hot water you get on your breasts. The most painful day for me was 6 days after delivery.

Karen said...

Here from Turia's blog. I am so sorry for your loss.

xoxo

Caroline said...

Suddafed also helps dry up your milk. I even put cabbage leaves on my breasts. Not sure if it helped or just made me laugh a little, which was somewhat welcome.

"And most of all, you were sure it would be impossible for you to function as a whole human being not buffeted by the waves of sorrow that swept over you in the early days of your tragedy. But you will. You will do all that and you will do more."
-Harriet Schiff

Marianne said...

So very sorry. Here from Turia's blog.

I Believe in Miracles said...

Here from Turia's blog. I'm so sorry for your loss.

My milk came in for 2 of my miscarriages and I used cabbage. And it did help. See here for directions - http://www.babymed.com/baby/cabbage-postpartum-breast-engorgement

I am so sorry for your loss. I wish there were better words to say, but there aren't. Just take all the time you need to grieve.

Heather said...

I just saw your last two posts. I'm so sorry for your loss. Words cannot even express. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Holly said...

I just went through something similar. I lost twins at 18 weeks and then 21 due to pPROM and was forced to deliver. The milk coming in is one of the cruelest parts. My heart aches for you. This is the meanest thing a mommy could go through. If you ever need to talk/email please do. Hollybenson10@yahoo.com. I am so so sorry. Its not fair its not fair its not fair.

t ut said...

I'm new to your blog, coming here from Finding a Way Out of IF...I just wanted to say that I'm deeply sorry you are going through something so incredibly painful. WTF. Much love to you. xoxo

Julia Spencer said...

You continue to be in my thoughts.

Mrs. Lost said...

I found you via Finding a Way Out of IF. I will be praying for you and your family. It isn't fair.

 
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